7 Steps for Reclaiming Our Pleasure, Connection, and Interdependence

I need to remind us that sex is important.

Intimacy is important.

Closeness...is important.

We are created for pleasure.

We are designed for interdependence.

I honestly believe people are happier without me in their lives.

People are happier without me in their lives.

I'm working with and getting curious about this belief I have that people are happier without me in their lives.

It's a thought pattern I apply to partners, to my children, to friends, to family.

It's painful.

"I'm tired" is the new "I'm fine." You're not tired. You're not fine.

I'm tired.

Are you?

I've noticed that for some people "tired" can be code for boredom or pessimism, frustration, irritation, impatience....

Sometimes it encompasses overwhelm, disappointment, doubt, or worry.

This is How To Invite Heartbrokenness To Teach You

I have been deeply grieving the last several weeks and letting my body show me how to forgive myself and others, how to heal, and how to love.

There's no pushing or forcing, no "should" or "shouldn't."

There's a deep surrender to "This is how I feel right now...This is how it is in this moment."

This is How To Gently Awaken Your Sexuality with Spring Energy

Feel the sun warming the air...

See the flowers bloom yellow, red, pink...

Taste fresh, dripping fruit...

Inhale freshly cut grass and squeezed lemons...

Here is what I want for us. Are you with me?

Here is what I want for us:

I want a relationship where we experience a connection, a close bond, an attachment.

I want a relationship where I can read your cues around what you need and want, and you can read mine...where we're willing to learn one another's cues and respond to them.

None of Us Wants to Be Abandoned...and how I want us to love more and deeper

A client wrote to me recently and asked,

"Can you help me to want her less...care about her less...and love her less than I do so that I am not putting pressure on her to communicate with me or have to be intimate with me emotionally?

Is that realistic?"

Which is More Closed Off: Your Heart or Your Sexuality?

For just a moment, close your eyes or let them gently unfocus.

Breathe into your heart.

Is it open?

Can you expand and soften into your heart with some ease?

The Most Difficult Season of Your Relationship Might Need Support

You are not alone.

If this has been the most difficult season your relationship has faced...

If this has been the most difficult chapter of your life...

You are not alone.

This is How You Remember Who You Are and Explore Tantra As Playful

Sometimes I forget that I went 30-something years without ever experiencing orgasm.

Sometimes I forget I am a certified Tantric Sex Coach.

Sometimes I forget that we're here for the full-spectrum experience of being human.

Gently Support One Another's Bodies and Sexuality with Loving Touch

Sit down with me?

I'm picturing us nestled around a small, square table.

The flat wood is darker, and the texture offers my chest calm and grounding sensations with a reminder of the outdoors.

Maybe you're across from me so we can look at one another.

Can we just be where we're at...right here, right now?

For a deeper connection within...so you might connect in love with your partner over the weekend...

Do something with me this morning?

Take a moment to perhaps close your eyes or just soften them.

Focus a few moments on your breath.

Are you feeling an auspicious opening toward the light today?

I've been thinking about you.

I woke up at 5:40 am this morning.

No real reason.

And when my logical, rational mind searched for reasons I might have woken up so early, I remembered it's December 21.

Lay Back, Remember Who You Are, and Return Home to Yourself

I lay back down after turning over to see what time it is.

It's too early.

My eyes are too dry, too swollen, too tired to be awake right now.

And here I am.

This Is How You Move Toward Embodied Self-Love

Something so powerful and deep happened in a coaching session a few weeks ago.

I've been thinking about it and wanting to share it, thinking it might click a few things into place for you, too.

Because most of us...we want to experience love with a partner, with our person.

The idea of self-love can feel so far-fetched and inaccessible because we first experience love in relationship and attachment to our primary caregivers.

Acknowledging Where We Are To Get To Where We Want To Be

I am so grateful for Eliza's (she/her) reminder yesterday...for the permission her post offers me.

Because I have a pretty great relationship with gratitude. I come into celebration and thankfulness and gratitude quite easily.

And yesterday as I was acknowledging a lighter aspect of US Thanksgiving,

in addition to acknowledging National Day of Mourning and learning deeper around the myths and erasure of indigenous people,

I found I could barely lean into gratitude without a spring of grief upwelling right next to it.

When I felt the trauma of Trump begin to soften in my body, I couldn't ignore what came next

First.

I want to share with you that I'm offering a live, embodied, guided practice around Trump trauma and anchoring into resilience on Thursday, December 10 from 5 - 6 pm online via Zoom for $22 and $11 for BIPOC and LGBTQIA+.

I didn't want to.

How to Not Get Overwhelmed and Numb To It All

I'm not sure where your thoughts or emotions are at right now, friend.

And over the last few days I've been running through a spectrum of grief and hope and despair and anger marked with sparks of action and creativity.

I've also been ruminating around what feminist marketing consultant Kelly Diels (she/her) calls my spot on the wall.